Alex


If you know me, you know that I love stories. I love hearing stories, and I love telling stories. However, the greatest story I could ever tell is this: the day I saw Jesus.

I grew up in a home of believers that prayed, loved, and cared deeply for those around them. From birth I listened to Bible stories and went to church with my parents. I loved Vacation Bible School and Sunday School. I was a very happy child growing up that loved to laugh. As a very young girl, I began comparing myself to my siblings and peers. At the age of four, with a tear stained face, I cried because I was not as thin as my oldest sister, or as smart as my brother. This started the trend of my childhood: Am I enough? My parents loved and supported me every day of my life; I couldn’t have been more blessed with the home I had, but I still felt a small hole in my heart that could not be filled here on earth.

The answer was always yes, I was enough, but it took me until the age of 14 to see it. My grades were never perfect, my room was never spotless, I found myself angry that I couldn’t be the person I wanted to become. I put the pressure on myself to be this image: perfection. I talked to God every day, but I never knew how quickly an answer could come when you are reaching out to Him.

I prayed on Panama City Beach, Florida, as a freshman in high school, “Lord, please let me feel whole. I want to feel like I am enough.” At that moment a weight lifted off of me. Twenty minutes later I heard my exact answer spoken, “To the girl in the back who is worried about being perfect, there is no such thing. The only perfect thing in this world is the love of Jesus Christ. If you are looking to fill your own void, you will never feel full.” I had never in my life felt such a peace. At this very second my heart was filled. I am enough not because of who I am, but because THE I AM is in my heart. My grades, messy room, relationships, looks, etc. do not define me because I am a child of the one great King.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. - Ephesians 2:10

Since that moment, I have lived my life so that every person I come in contact with may know three things: 1) You are loved. 2) You are enough. 3) You are created to be the child of a King.

Seven years later and my heart is still overflowing with the love of Jesus.

I encourage you, my friends, to do the same. My life is beautiful even in hardships because I have experienced the greatest story ever told, John 3:16. As a future elementary school teacher my prayer is that every child feels that my classroom is as loving as the home I grew up in so that maybe I can plant the seed of a new story: Jesus.

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#identity #selfesteem #choosingJesus #insecurity #perfectionism

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