Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart’s desires. - Psalm 37:4
When it comes to the people God has placed in my life, I am so blessed.
God has given me amazing parents, an exemplary brother, Godly friends, and countless individuals who have encouraged me to follow my dreams.
I am so blessed, but I have a confession. I feel lonely. It doesn’t matter how many times I remind myself of all the amazing people God has placed in my life - I still feel lonely.
Because I’m single.
I’m the definition of the girl the movies make fun of (I’m twenty-two, never been kissed, and never had a boyfriend). I’m THAT single girl, and it makes me feel alone.
I feel less than, unworthy, unlovable. No man has shown an interest in me, so I must be damaged. I look at the all the girls who have boyfriends (someone who chose to be with them), and I feel lonely. Yes, my parents love me. Yes, my friends make me feel special. But I don’t have someone who chooses to love me.
At least, that’s what I thought.
One night, I sat in the dayroom of my dorm across from my friend Megan.
“I want to be loved, Megan,” I said. “And not just loved by my friends and family. I want to be loved by a Godly man. I mean, I’m so grateful for my guy friends, but it—”
“It’s just not the same.” Megan nodded her head slowly as she finished my sentence.
“I just feel alone, Megan. I mean, I know that God has a plan and that He is taking care of me. . .” I paused and looked Megan in the eye.
I had found my answer.
Subconsciously, through my rant, God answered my question - He was taking care of me. He knows what I want; He knows the desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4), and He wants to give it to me. But He wants to do everything in His time. 2 Peter 3:9a states, “The Lord isn’t really slow about His promise, as some people think. No, He is being patient for your sake.”
God isn’t being slow; I’ve not been put on the sidelines of life; I’m not alone. I’m just waiting - waiting for God to fulfill His perfect plan for my life.
I must admit; this concept is hard for me, especially when it comes to relationships. I want to be with someone; I want to be married; I want to be loved. BUT if I let my desire control my decisions, I will be miserable - I’ll have the life I wanted, but I won’t have the life I was created to live.
God promises in Jeremiah 29:11 “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ says the LORD. ‘They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.’” God’s plans are always good, even when they are not the plans we had envisioned for our life.
However, I’m not going to sit behind my computer screen and pretend I’ve found victory over my loneliness, because I would be lying. I haven’t figured it out, but I have changed my perspective. Now, when loneliness begins to consume my wounded, broken soul, I turn to God, and with tears in my eyes, I beg Him to fill the emptiness.
I don’t know if I’ll ever find love (though I long to), but I do know that I am loved by an all-sufficient God who wants what is best for me.
Sometimes, I feel lonely. But I’ve realized that even when I feel lonely, I am never alone.
1. What areas of life make you feel lonely?
2. How can you begin to trust God’s plan with this area of loneliness?
Abba, I HATE this. I hate feeling this way; I hate feeling lonely. Abba, I want to be loved; I want to be adored, but it hasn’t happened. I feel like I’ve been left out, Abba. I feel like You’ve left me out. But Abba, as I read Your word and listen to Your promises, I know that You have not left me alone. You are there for me. You have great plans for me. You are taking care of me. Abba, when I feel lonely, hold me, comfort me, remind me of Your plan, remind me of Your promises. I want to trust you with my loneliness, Abba. Give me the strength to know that You have everything under control. I love You, Abba. I give my loneliness to You. Amen.
WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD? CLICK HERE