That is a word that I have struggled with throughout different seasons of my life since I was little. The idea of being someone’s first choice, someone’s best friend, someone’s person. It is a word that has caused me hurt over the years when the last thing I have felt was chosen. I have struggled with feeling chosen in friendships, relationships, and I have experienced many times when I have felt lonely because of this insecurity.
All throughout college, but specifically over the past year I experienced a lot change which came with moments of pain. The people I looked to for support in my life were quickly diminishing in a short period of time. I was asking God to bring new people and new support into my life who would choose me. Now, a year later I can see good that came from some of the pain and see where God was working that I couldn’t see at that time. God has even answered some of my prayers for those truly good friendships and relationships rooted in faith that I was seeking. However, I still have feelings of being unchosen; that fear is still in my heart sometimes. I started to really pray about why. God has put good people in my life, why am I still insecure and fearful of not being chosen?
I had been praying about this question I was wrestling with and really contemplating it with Scripture when I decided to watch a sermon online one morning. It was about being children of God - specifically for me being His daughter, which means He loves me so much despite what I have done in my life. I have heard all of these things before, and it wasn’t the most moving sermon I’ve ever listened to, but I started crying in my room. I was crying because in that moment I really just felt “you are chosen” in my heart. I felt my Father speaking to me that He chose me, He continues to choose me, and He will always choose me even when other people don’t. I just sat there and let the weight of those words and that idea just sit on my heart and mind. I thanked Him for reminding me of that truth I so deeply needed to hear and for calling me a chosen daughter when I do not deserve it.
"For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs."
- Zephaniah 3:17
We live in a world where people are going to hurt us, even those closest to us, and we are going to feel unchosen sometimes. And that is okay, because God chooses us over and over. He wants us to come to Him in those times we are hurting, and He wants to tell us we are loved. He is always there for us and nothing we do can do will make Him not choose us. This gives me joy and peace and helps me take off the pressure I sometimes put on my earthly relationships. I want to live chosen by my Father, because He is the only one that I truly need to be chosen by, and that won’t waiver.
I am chosen.
"You have been set apart as holy to the Lord your God, and he has chosen you from all the nations of the earth to be his own special treasure." - Deuteronomy 14:2
WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD? CLICK HERE