What is the purpose of sex? Why did God create it? The world often says sex isn’t a big deal; it’s just about physical pleasure. In Christian circles, sex isn’t often talked about. When it is talked about, there is not always accurate, helpful information.
At Lane of Roses, we often like to start with asking ourselves what God has to say about any given topic. So, what does God say about sex? We can derive from Scripture two main purposes of sex:
Procreation
"God blessed them and said to them, 'Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground'” (Gen. 1:28).
After God created the world and humankind, he invited humans to be co-creators with him. He gave us the ability to create life and the encouragement to do so. Sex is an avenue from which that happens.
Connection
"For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).
It’s true that sex can include physical pleasure. However, pleasure for pleasure’s sake is fleeting. Instead, the pleasure is meant to draw one close to one’s spouse. During sex, hormones—including dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins—are released throughout the body, causing physical pleasure. These hormones that God created result not only in physical pleasure but also in bonding; their intention is to connect you with one another.
One of the Hebrew words used to reference sex in the Bible is yada (e.g., Genesis 4:1). This word is often translated to English as knew: “Adam knew his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain.” This word indicates an experiential knowing. It’s the same word God used to describe how the Egyptians and the Israelites will know that He is God because of what they witness (e.g., Exodus 6:7). It is not just knowledge about God; this is an experiential knowing of God.
The Bible’s use of the same word for sexual intimacy between spouses makes the connection clear: Just as God experientially knows His people and they Him, spouses experientially know one another through sex. Sex is intended to bond spouses to one another.
It’s so important to know what God says about sex so that we can understand his purpose behind it and the value in it. Because of this, Lane of Roses has created Building Intimacy, a seven-section workbook for premarital and marital couples to work through together. Written by myself, a licensed marriage and family therapist, along with a pelvic floor physical therapist, the workbook provides accurate and helpful information on sex so that you can build intimacy in your romantic relationship.
The workbook gives you the opportunity to individually consider your own thoughts and experiences and to discuss them with your partner. The conversations that will take place throughout completion of this resource will help you and your partner understand one another better and learn how to love each other well in this area of your relationship.
Want your copy of Building Intimacy? Click HERE to check it out in our shop. Looking for counseling for yourself or as a couple? Check out Lane of Roses Counseling.
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